Writing this blog is becoming more and more enjoyable as time goes by. I have to admit though, I knew nothing about building or managing websites when I began. What got the whole thing started was an e-mail I received. A man who owns a marketing company contacted me looking for clients and I responded to him. I did it more as a lark than for any real reason but surprisingly we struck up a dialogue and a relationship ensued. In retrospect I suppose I was looking for someone to help me on my path and that is when we find help, when we are looking. Anyways, I just wanted to give a big kudos to my friend K.C. at Candid Consults. His advice on my website and his overall help and motivation have been invaluable to me. Thank you my friend. Now, on with my blog.
In my last post I left off with my realizing that I have a victim mentality and how it has been such a limiting factor for my whole life. Acknowledging my situation was the first step. I needed to accept my condition fully. I own this mindset and I am responsible for the way I think and the life I lead. My life as it is today is the result of the decisions I have made over the course of my life. If I want a better situation then I need to start using a different process while making my decisions. Accepting responsibility for my life is the path I willingly take and it all starts with self honesty. I can lie to the world but if I truly want to improve my situation I have to stop lying to myself!
I realize that I continue to state the same concept over and over but my self talk is a critical component to changing my self image. I need to set up a loop inside my head of positive self talk. I believe that if I hear the same thing enough times (my mind needs to accept that the concept is feasible, of course) my mind will accept it as the truth, and take the appropriate actions based upon that belief. So, my life no longer happens to me; I create the script.
So I am now controlling my self talk, this is how I change my beliefs about reality that are programmed into my unconscious mind. My unconscious mind, I guess I see this part of my brain like a computer program. Kind of like an auto pilot program for running my life. It’s job is to protect me and keep me safe. It keeps me safe by telling me who I am and what I can or cannot do. It is the part of me that makes the rules for my life. It is very powerful. It uses emotions to enforce its rules over my life. How many times have you known the right thing to do but could not make yourself do it, because of your emotions?
Your conscious mind is the mind space that lets you run potential scenarios within it. Let’s say that tomorrow you are going to go hunting for a buffalo. (I told you I was old) Your conscious mind is the place where you practice for every scenario that may arise, and your unconscious mind sets the rules for what you think is truly possible. These are the real tools that have let us grow as a species. These two parts of our brain interact to help us influence our reality. It is how we decide what our actions will be.
The question is, how can we impact this process? First we must look at how one mind space influences the other. I mentioned that our unconscious mind controls us through our emotions. We can minimize that control by learning how to manipulate our emotional state. This is a real skill set that takes time and practice to use effectively but meditation and self monitoring are tools that will get you there.
The other part of the equation is how do you impact your unconscious mind? The key is to control your environment. We do become like the people we spend time with, and we do begin to believe what we hear over and over. That is why your environment when you were a young child is so important. That was how the parameters for your self image were originally set. If you don’t become of aware of those parameters and change them (which is very difficult to do) you will be confined by those parameters for you entire life! I believe this to be the only path to true change.
For this change to begin however, you must accept responsibility for the process. Most people will not exercise the self honesty required to start this process, that is because it is painful. It was very painful for me to acknowledge that I have had a victim mentality for most of my life. The only thing that made that acceptance possible was a greater pain. For me, that greater pain was that I am going to die a very poor, very lonely old man if I don’t start controlling my environment. I am responsible for my future! Come back for more tomorrow.